To the cashier at Target,
I am sorry that me having four kids with another one on the way, is a burden to you. Especially since you will not be the one raising these them. I know it is hard to be an on-looker watching us moms raise children.
I am sorry that as you pointed out (loudly to the people behind me) that my “husband needs to keep his hands to himself” because well, I like that he still finds me attractive and wants to let me know with physical touch. I obviously have a problem because I shouldn’t.
I am sorry that you felt the need to make sure that I knew sex put me in the current situation I am in (and I am surprised you didn’t offer to buy me a box of condoms with the way you were speaking to me). I do need constant reminders of what causes babies.
I am sorry that you couldn’t believe all these beautiful children were mine. I mean, it is quite plausible that I pick kids up off the street to load them into Target carts and push them around while I try and find my coffee creamer of choice.
I am sorry that I am expecting another child. I know you feel bad that I have to have the burden of raising not four but FIVE kids in a few months. It will be a burden for you to watch.
I am sorry that I made you feel bad for me. I hope I didn’t ruin the rest of your day.
A happily married mother of five who believes all her children are gifts, not garbage